Spring has Sprung…or has it?

Well, it’s official, by the calendar we are in Spring. A time of year for new growth, for life to emerge after the harsh, cold, dark winter…except we are still in that harsh, cold, dark winter. Mother Nature- how am I supposed to emerge full and bursting with new life? How am I supposed to come twirling out, welcoming the gloriousness that will be Spring sun and storms…if you can’t be bothered to stop the gosh darn forsaken winter tantrum storms? 

Ok- that was a lot for an introduction- I guess you could say I’m reaching the end of my tether with snow and winter. The snow and winter weather started so early for us this year, and with a bang I might add- nothing like a shocking 5 ft of snow to usher in Winter before Thanksgiving. There was another 5 ft snowstorm right as Christmas moved in (which we missed due to traveling), and it’s just seemed to be a forever gray landscape. Our false spring came super early this year- talking the beginning a February, almost a full month, and now it just seems like Mother Nature seems to be toying with us. 

As I’ve mentioned and discussed a wealth of times both here on this blog, as well as across social media, I’m a big believer in magic moments, in little joys, in finding the light in everyday moments. But even with my comedic take on the snow, it’s starting to get harder to watch the snow come down and think- oh how beautiful. I mean it is OBVIOUSLY beautiful, and I am OBVIOUSLY over it. 

AND I’m over wearing jeans (and pants in general)- bring on the spring/summer wardrobe of dresses, skirts, and more relaxed clothes please and thank you.

I’m ready to be sipping my morning tea on my front porch, spending the slowly lengthening evenings in the backyard. I’m ready to transform my space into a little paradise- full of light and fresh growing things. Ready to go for walks through the woods, and along the sidewalks of our neighborhood without looking like a giant puff marshmallow (seriously- just the preparation to head outside makes the worth of going for a walk questionable). While I miss the sledding, I’m ready for my kids to be able to run down the hill to the playground and play for hours outside- truly tiring themselves out. 

Oh, I am yearning for Spring. 

I hate to think too much of it – if anything, winters here have taught me to be grateful for every moment of whatever the weather throws at us whether that’s a surprise snow or a 50-degree sunny day- but it does seem like we seem to be on an upswing. Overall temperatures are trending upwards, and snowfall amounts are trending downwards. I’m hopeful that before too long we can say a fond farewell to the depths of winter. 

So, a toast to Spring, a toast to warmer weather slowly coming, to longer days, and to a new season to celebrate…even if it’s a whole month before we actually see it. 

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Jewish Literature 2nd Edition – Non-Fiction

It is time for our second edition of my Jewish Literature posts! I’m thinking this is going to be probably a once a month or once every other month schedule for these, mostly because I already have so many to talk about! I’m also going to try and keep with the concept of choosing two books that share some commonality- whether that be in genre, topic, age range, something along the same lines. 

The first edition of Jewish Literature covered two Literary Fiction/Romance novels. You can read that post HERE. I will have a separate page to link where there will be a roundup of all these posts, but I am still working on that.

This second edition we are going to focus on nonfiction, activism style books. I’ve found that this is an area that is interesting to try and find books in. It seems like the books that I’d like to read focus on aspects that are lacking or where the general populations thoughts are concerning Jewish People, and most books seem to focus on the political or the “why not us” style argument. 

Once again, I have two books that I had very different thoughts about. One I really enjoyed, highly recommend, buy for everyone and think everyone should read. The other I liked, but found it swung a bit too far away from what I’d like to see Jewish Activism be (which is an entirely different conversation). I’ll start with the positive – mostly because if you stop reading halfway through- I’d like you to read the recommendation of the book that I’d like you to pick up and think you need to read. 

People Love Dead Jews by Dara Horn

Ok, this book is a masterpiece and something that I feel like we don’t talk about, or honestly, even realize is a thing. Dara Horn takes the most famous or most talked about Jews (all of whom, or most, happen to be…dead) and dives deep into their stories, into why we love them, and why we focus so much on those stories. 

She starts the book out with a startling commentary on how she has only been reached out for commentary about Judaism, Jewish Life, and the like once an act of terror (and I mean an international level newsworthy even- like the Pittsburgh Synagogue or similar, not the acts of violence Jewish people are subjected to almost daily, or the hatred that spews out of people’s mouths every day). It seemed she was only asked for commentary, for a piece of journalism AFTER Jewish people had died. And that triggered something in her brain to examine it from a historical perspective. 

And boy, did she. This book really opened my eyes in a lot of ways, and I found myself equally gasping/saying woah, agreeing with her commentary, and crying at the sheer unfairness of it all. This book had me think about Anne Frank’s Diary in a completely different way- and I guarantee it will you too. But it wasn’t just Anne Frank, throughout history we tend to celebrate the Jewish People, to campaign for them, to help them ONLY AFTER a catastrophe has occurred. There isn’t a lot of the why’s or how’s, but more so a concept of laying bare the reality of what it means to only care about the Jewish people after their dead. 

I will never stop talking about this book and quite honestly think it should be one of those books that everyone picks up. 

Jews Don’t Count by David Baddiel

I’ve had this book on my radar for a minute, in fact I’ve owned it for a little while, but I hadn’t picked it up until the last couple months. Here’s the thing, a lot of my issues with social activism, especially where the Jewish people are concerned, is there is a lot of “What about us?” or “When is it our turn”. Valid questions, ones we ask ourselves as Jewish people all the time, but questions that I don’t care for. It implies that a) you can’t care for more than one cause at one time, which is false as we are all humans and we are multi-faceted and layered as humans and b) it implies that Jewish people should be/are more or less than others, which is just…wrong. We are all people, and we should all care about other people. But that’s a humanity thing and much bigger than this series about Jewish Literature. 

So, at the beginning of the book David addresses this right away. He says something along the lines about how he hates that question and the idea that groups have to “take turns”, but that it seems that in activism we’ve reached this point where that is the best way to explain where we’re at. I don’t know if I entirely agree with that because I feel like there are other ways to handle Jewish Activism, but I’m also not entirely in that realm, so I might (and probably am) missing some of that. 

Anyways, the book is a look at how, historically and in a modern setting, Jewish people are left out of the conversation when it comes to any sort of “ism” talk. There are specific examples stated about how politicians treat accusations of antisemitism, celebrities, and joe shmo across the street as well. I feel like this book is important to read (even though David Baddiel is British, and UK based so some of the sentiment doesn’t crossover to the US well) because there is a lot that we can miss- little things that we may not even think about but are important to call out. However, the book didn’t quite feel the same…call to action or I’m not sure how to word this, fix the problem as I think it could have been. Obviously, you can’t make people love Jewish People, but this felt like a very accusatory book and then didn’t follow up with any sort of…I don’t even know. 

I’ve got a couple of other Non-Fiction books that deal with the Social Activism sphere kind of on my radar as I’d like to read a couple more to compare a bit more in depth, but it’s going to be a bit before I get to those. I think of these two, you definitely need to read People Love Dead Jews by Dara Horn. 

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A Cuppa Cosy Reads – February 2023

Wow oh wow did February just blow me out of the water. Not only was it a busy one in real life, but it was a busy reading month too! I somehow managed to read a total of 10 books (insert a woah face here). Not only was it a whopper of an amount, but my average rating was a 4.125. Not too bad for a month I’ll say! I’m really hoping that this is a sign of a continued good reading year ahead of me- I was excited about every book I picked up, intrigued to read them, and just devoured books in a way that I haven’t in a long time. Let’s talk about them. 

Small Game by Blair Braverman 3.5 Stars – This is a book about contestants that are on a wilderness challenge game show. Think…oh I don’t know The Challenge or Naked and Afraid, but the production and camera crew just disappear halfway through. You follow the contestants as reality well and truly starts to set in. I enjoyed this one, even if I had this weird incomplete sense while and after reading it. 

Crave by Tracy Wolff 3 Stars – I picked this one up and while I don’t regret it, I definitely think that this…story didn’t end up working for me. I don’t know if it was too much of the play off of Twilight, or if it was just an overall feeling of “too much” for me, but it just didn’t work out. We are following a girl who has lost her parents as she relocates to a school where…not everyone is human. 

Chain of Thorns by Cassandra Clare 5 Stars This concluding book to this trilogy was incredible. Such highs, such lows, such a ride from start to finish. The past few months has seen me really fall back into Cassandra Clare’s Shadowhunter World and I’m not mad about it- especially with these later novels and trilogies. 

Romancing Mister Bridgerton by Julia Quinn 4 Stars I picked this up on a whim- I wanted to see if I would even enjoy the books- as Bridgerton the show is one of my favorites, but I was pleasantly surprised. I feel like the romance came on a bit suddenly, but it’s all in good fun. There definitely was some spice too, which I don’t know if I thought would be there – I figured Netflix embellished, but nope. 

*** The next three books I read as part of a read 3 books in a 3 day weekend challenge- you can read a little snippet HERE or catch the full “vlog” on my Instagram (@acuppacosy)***

The Very Secret Society of Irregular Witches by Sangu Mandanna – 5 Stars This was like a cozy cup of good tea- just a wonderful way to spend an afternoon) and yes, I read it in an afternoon). I heard someone say this was a “soft place to land” and I couldn’t agree more. This is just a good one. 

Radiant Sin by Katee Robert 4.5 Stars Wow oh wow, somehow, I go into each one of these wondering…what can we do this time and each time it stuns me. I highly recommend these if you need something a little (or a lot depending on your preference) spicy, quick/captivating, and fun to read. Modern reimagining’s of Greek myths (heavy on the re-imagining).

Finley Donovan Knocks Em Dead by Elle Cosimano 5 Stars Ok, wow what a difference book two makes in a series! I found the first book to be OK- in fact the main character just irritated me for a third of the book, but that was not the case in this second book. I loved it! I don’t know if it was actually better, or if we just didn’t need all the groundwork that the first book provided. 

I Survived the Nazi Invasion by Lauren Tarshis & I Survived the Nazi Invasion Graphic Novel by Georgia Ball NR I read both this one and the next for a middle grade/juvenile edition of Jewish Literature (hence the no rating) and found these to be alright. I don’t really know what to expect from middle grade literature as I feel like it’s so catered to each individual child and their own concepts of reality- as well as the parents and their parenting philosophies. As a Jewish child, I was intimately familiar with a lot of aspects of The Holocaust that I would venture to say my non-Jewish peers were not. So, while these were good and they do tell a story of a part of The Holocaust (and a good one for children to read), I don’t know that I would rely on this to teach or talk to my children about The Holocaust. 

Linked by Gordon Korman NR I’ll keep my thoughts on this brief, but I found this to be such a good read- age appropriate, content appropriate, and very good at tying history, to modern life, to children, to society and to Judaism. This book is a great jumping off point for a wide variety of conversations, not just about Judaism and Jew Hatred, but also about racism, history, and people. 

The Wisteria Society of Lady Scoundrels by India Holton 3 Stars This book was…ok. It was fine. A woman’s society of pirates, with flying houses, dry humor, and a tie to the Bronte’s? Sounds great! I don’t know what about this missed the mark for me, but it was a combination of probably a couple of things (the romance not being swoonish, the ending seemingly dragging, the plot being second…second to what though I couldn’t tell you). 

And that’s it! Like I’ve already shared- these first two months of the year have me really excited for what this year will hold for me in books and reading.

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A Chatty Re-evaluation and Sharing Joy

I didn’t really have a post planned for today. Or rather, I had a million different ideas on what to post, posts prepared, and none of it really felt…right. I’m not sure- I’m kind of entering a bit of a funk with the blog. Not in a bad way, just in a…where do we go from here kind of way. What do I share? How do I share it? Do I even need to share it?

You could say in some ways there is a bit of an imposter syndrome moment happening over here. I hate saying it like that because I don’t know that that is exactly what it is. I go through these moments throughout the year of wondering if I really add any value (which HA wake up Mia- that IS Imposter Syndrome). These moments tend to come at times where there just isn’t a lot going on with life. Or at times when I feel like I’m creating much better…content in other spaces on the internet (videos on IG are really sparking a special kind of joy lately). 

I’m basically in a space where I want to reevaluate ever so slightly what I’m doing. A lot of the things that I’ve written about in the past, and tend to focus on, are…well not happening this year. We don’t have many trips planned because of life and work and such; we don’t have much going on that I can talk and share about publicly (not that I would necessarily choose to do, but I’ve always somewhat shared things that are affecting us). And so, I’ve just been trying to figure out what I actually want to write and talk about. This has been a thing that seems to happen every couple years – I tend to look back and forward to see where things stand (believe it or not I’ve been blogging in some form for 8 years now!). 

 So, what is going on? Well, the boys are on winter recess this year- I’m always shocked at how independent and self…sufficient, self-entertained they are getting as the months go by. I’ve filled in some of our days with playdates and errands (ambitious of me given the weather that’s coming in), but I’ve also scheduled in some time at home to rest and play. They’ve become amazing at simply playing together in their given spot in the house- whether that’s their room or the Lego area downstairs and allowing me to get things done or have a bit of quiet time. It’s shocking in some ways, sad in others, but overall, just super helpful haha. It’s a new level of parenthood that I’ve been grateful and sad to step in to- like much of parenthood. 

I’ve been a bit of a reading fiend this past week or so- I’ve just been devouring books in a way I haven’t in a long time. It’s been so refreshing to spend so much free time in between the pages of a book, to challenge my reading abilities, and just escape. When I’m not reading, I’m creating or I’m parenting, and I’ve just found a real joy in those three things together. 

It’s funny- when I picked my word for the year back at Rosh Hashanah (the Jewish New Year- read about it HERE). I had no idea just how much it would guide and ring true to me. I’ve found life to be filled with so much joy these past few months, even when its hard or when I’m feeling a bit down. I’ve once again found a contentedness to our lives, a complete space of peace with where things are at just right now. I’m looking forward to experiencing more of this joy throughout the year- and sharing it with you! 

Something I’ve been thinking about implementing it’s a bit more of the slice of life stuff that I share over on Instagram. Not in the same way, maybe when I put together a reel or video of something we’ve done- I might do a little blog post here, go into a bit more detail, share links if needed and so forth. I feel like I want to immortalize some of these just true joys filled moments in so many ways and I think finding a spot on my blog for them might be good- especially as I’m reevaluating my content on here as it is. 

With that being said, if you’ve made this far through all my waffling – I want to share two little pieces of joy from the past week or so! 

The first was our little Valentine’s Day celebration. The boys had a half day at school (which was full of parties and card/gift exchanges), so I decided to put together a little something for the afternoon. I told them to work with each other to pick one movie, one of their favorites, while I put together a “little” charcuterie board. Well, the “little” charcuterie board ended up going a bit overboard and we spent all afternoon curled up in the living room eating a variety of cheese, salami, crackers, and fruit while watching Star Wars. I also made a special heart shaped Challah that was topped with pink and red X/O sprinkles and filled with chocolate. We made a total of three loaves, two of which were shared with friends, and enjoyed it all week long! It was a small but very special event for the boys and me. 

The second was a reading challenge I did over the weekend. I’ve done these challenges before- usually a read for 24/48hrs or something along those lines, but this time I had three books that I really wanted to read and wanted to read now. I knew they would all be compulsively readable- as in once I started, I wouldn’t be able to stop before I finished, so I decided to go for it!

And somehow, I managed to read all three in the three-day weekend. I managed to read The Very Secret Society of Irregular Witches by Sangu Mandanna, Radiant Sin by Katee Robert, and Finlay Donovan Knocks ‘Em Dead by Elle Cosimano in 3 days! I surprised myself as this was a challenge, I didn’t know I could succeed at, the kids are one winter recess (which started a day early), I was trying to do a couple of fun things for them a movie night, and two hockey nights, AND I was doing it all solo- just me and the boys. But remember how earlier I talked about how independent and grown and self-engaged they’ve become? It was a real game changer for the weekend.

So that’s it on this chatty little Winter Recess post! Coming up I’ve got my monthly reading wrap up, a Jewish Literature post (that’s been written and waiting for a minute now), and maybe a little royal commentary! 

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My Morning Routine – Updated in 2023

The time has come that I feel like it’s time to do an updated Morning Routine. Some things have changed, some are completely the same from the last morning routine I wrote a couple years back. The biggest change is that I’ve been dealing with chronic pain for the past couple of years. I have been through physical therapy – finished that about a year ago, but the pain is starting to come back again (this is to be expected with what is going on with my back). So, back to the doc, physical therapist, and more I go! Anyway, when I wake up in the morning I don’t know if it’s going to be a mid-pain day or a high pain day, which, as you can imagine, makes a massive difference. I stick to this routine generally, but on a high pain day I tend to take a little longer to get out of bed in the morning. 

Before we really get into this routine, I want to note that a morning routine isn’t a lot without a solid evening routine. I’ll be talking about that in an upcoming blog post. 

So, weekdays my alarm goes off at 6:00AM. During the school year the boys get up around 7:20-7:30AM, and I need to have at least an hour for myself before I go get them up. One of my intentions for this year was to get out of bed when my alarm goes off, which, most of the time I actually do. There are some instances where I don’t, but most morning my alarm goes off and within 5 minutes I’m out of bed. The biggest help for this is some sort of a sunrise alarm clock going off when my alarm on my phone does. I wrote about this in my “magical winter” post HERE, but I found this great alternative on Amazon (which you can find HERE). It’s not a full-on sunrise alarm clock, but it’s working for me for now. 

I’ll put on some sort of calming or inspiring Spotify playlist depending on what mood I’m in/what I need to set myself up for the day. Beyond that I do not look at my phone. I have the Do Not Disturb set on my phone, it goes on at 9:00PM and goes off at 7:00AM. I try not to look at anything on my phone until 7:00AM, with social media/Email/Whatever until 8:00 or 9:00 AM. I just find that if I start my day on my phone, it instantly shifts my mood and mindset- even if it’s just good things I’m seeing. 

I hop out of my bed and will typically start the day with a couple of stretches to get my back moving and loose. My chronic pain is in my back and the biggest thing I can do to help it is to stretch it out first thing. From there I jump in the shower, either just a quick shower or a full on wash my hair, shave, and do all the things. Now, this is where my morning has changed the most- I used to try and do some yoga or a quick cardio blast or something to move my body, but I have found that it just didn’t work for me. I either didn’t do it, and then beat myself up for not doing it, OR I would do it and then rush through everything else I need to absolutely get done before I get the kids up. So, I still do these things, but later in the day. 

Around 6:30-6:45 (depending on the hair wash situation), I’m typically sat in front of my mirror putting on a little bit of makeup and then getting dressed. My wintertime wardrobe is vastly different from my spring/summer (and not just because it’s cold), but I’ve talked about all the wardrobe and clothing things HERE. 

At about 7:00AM, I head downstairs to open up all the blinds and get breakfast started. If you follow along on my social media, you’ll know this part of my routine quite well as it’s one of my favorite things. I start by going into the sunroom and opening up the blinds on our biggest window. During winter it’s still relatively dark, but in the summer the light just floods in. Then I slowly go around to the rest of the windows downstairs opening the blinds, turning lamps on, and creating the cozy morning space. 

Once that is done, I return to the kitchen where I put the kettle on and prep breakfast. It’s simple most morning, bagel for myself, pop tarts or donut holes for the boys. Some mornings I’ll make a breakfast for my husband and myself – breakfast burritos- once the kids are on the bus. When we are able, we typically will have some sort of berry as well. The boys get up around 7:20AM during the school year, get dressed and such, and then come downstairs to eat breakfast. 

Both boys ride the bus to school, and I’ll walk with them down to the bus stop (which is just a couple houses down from ours) and wait with them. Once they’re on the bus, I finish up my tea and visit with Robert. This little chunk of time is meant for chatting and planning. It’s also when I typically will do a little journaling and look at my tasks for the day/map out how I want my day to go. 

I try to have my “day” start at 9:00AM with unloading and putting away the dishes in the kitchen. Then I’ll do the cleaning chores I have set out for the day (I deep clean one section of the house a day, and do a light tidy up the entire house every evening) and finally, around 10:00AM or so I’ll head into the office to get started on my computer tasks for the day. 

And that’s it! It doesn’t really change too much as I’ve found that it really works. I think the biggest game changer to my morning and day is getting up before my kids. Even if it’s just 10 minutes, it makes a difference. 

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A Cuppa Cosy Reads – January 2023

New year, new books! I’m pumped for this new year of reading and to discover a whole slew of new books and authors that I’ll come to love. I’m not sure, I just feel like 2023 is going to be my reading year (not that the past few haven’t been, but I definitely slowed down a lot the second half of last year). And we are starting out with a good bang! I gave an average rating of 3.96 over 8 books. I didn’t expect it to go that well, but it’s a strong start to the year. 

So, let’s get into the books…

The Silent History by Eli Horowitz – 3 Stars I honestly had some real excitement about this book when I read the back in Half Price Books. An entire generation that can’t speak? Let’s talk about that! It sounded so intriguing, and it WAS, BUT I feel like I missed out on something by not reading it in its’ original medium (which was an app that would drop sections of the book- which is told entirely in like recorded interviews). I don’t know that it translated well to book format as it definitely drags on in spots. I enjoyed it and it’s an interesting idea, but again, think I missed out on part of the experience by reading it in book format. 

Legends & Latte’s by Travis Baldree – 4.5 Stars I loved this. I’m not even sure what it is specifically about this book, but it was just so…cozy. We are following an orc who has decided to get out of the game, retire as it were, from bounty/treasure hunting and start a slower calmer life opening a coffee shop in a small town. We follow her on this new quest of sorts and watch how she learns what life can truly be. Fantasy meets cozy meets the smallest hint of romance in a book that made me feel all the feels. 

Spare by Prince Harry – NR I mean is anyone surprised I picked this up? I pre ordered the minute I was able to and started reading it once it landed on my doorstep. I have to say, I feel like readers will get what they want out of this, whether they are pro or con. Reading the entire context of the book, rather than the sensational articles nit picking, paints a very definite picture. It is only one side of the story, and there is definitely more to the story, but Prince Harry is very frank in (most of at least) his…errors and he doesn’t really badmouth the Royal Family as a whole. I could write a whole blog post just about this situation, but for now I’ll say- I did enjoy reading this book. 

A Court of Silver Flames by Sarah J Maas – 4 Stars I wasn’t going to pick this up- I’m not a massive fan of Nesta and after the initial trilogy ended (and that weird novella) I was good. I just didn’t care anymore. HOWEVER, after completing the second book in the Crescent City series, and hearing from a couple of friends that this book was worth it, I picked it up from the library. I will say…I enjoyed it. I don’t know if it’s beyond that, but I did like the conclusiveness at the end of the book. It felt very complete, more so than the original trilogy conclusion. 

Graceling (Graphic Novel) by Kristin Cashore, Adapted and Illustrated by Gareth Hinds 3 Stars I cannot tell you how many times I’ve picked up Graceling in my local library only to not actually read it and then return it. It’s been many. I’ve heard so many good things, but I just have never brought myself to actually read it. So, when I saw the graphic novel while volunteering, I figured why not. I’m glad I read the graphic novel over the book- I enjoyed the story well enough, but it is very much something I’ve read before and not something I’m interested in actually reading again at this time. 

Galatea by Madeline Miller – 4.5 Stars When I saw this, I had to get it. I love when Madeline Miller writes from a mom’s perspective. She just manages to truly encapsulate so many of those feelings so beautifully and this was no different. My only complaint was that it was so short- though I don’t know how it would have translated to a longer work. Truly enjoyed. 

Queen of Air and Darkness by Cassandra Clare – 3.75 Stars This is the third book in this trilogy (series maybe?), and I feel about the same as I did about the first two. I enjoyed this one, but I felt like it could have been edited down quite a bit. There was a lot of repetition as we hear/see things from different viewpoints. When it was good it was good, but when it was repetitive it dragged. 

The Savior’s Book café Story in Another World Vol. 2 by Kyouka Izumi – 5 Stars This is just one of my favorite manga’s – it’s just so quaint, and basically my dream life. I can’t wait to get to the next in the series. 

And that was it! A pretty good start this reading year and I am looking forward to seeing a couple of new releases over February, and the coming months. What did you read in January?

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A Magical Winter

Winter can be rough. No matter where you are located (at least in the Northern Hemisphere) the days are shorter, they tend to be darker, its colder and we all tend to enter a bit of a hibernation. It’s funny as I never really thought of it that way- but, like many animals, we do tend to hibernate in the winter in some form. Whether that means that we just stay home more, stay inside, or if we actually struggle with a level of depression that tends to be present in those darkest months of Winter. And with that hibernation can come a level of…stagnation. There is so much “staying put” that it envelops us and tends to not only just affect what we do, but also how we think and feel. Seasonal Depression (technically called Seasonal Affective Disorder of SAD, but I’m shortening it for the purposes of this post) is a very real thing and a very common thing. 

How we deal with Seasonal Depression is such a personal thing. For some it requires a level of medication, for others natural remedies, and for some a combination of different things. For me, I’ve found that making an intentional shift to my morning routines, to my outlook, to what I eat and do really helps. 

I don’t know that I had ever dealt with Seasonal Depression prior to our move to Germany. And it wasn’t Germany’s fault that I got it- we just happened to get these super thick foggy weeks (yes weeks, not days) where you couldn’t see past your car hood, and it would just sit. Unmoving. I was driving home one day from playgroup with the boys and the direction my thoughts went was…unheard of for me. It crept up on me and, until my brain cycled through that, I didn’t realize that it was actually Seasonal Depression. 

It wasn’t that I didn’t think I would ever deal with Seasonal Depression, it was that I was such a gloomy day kind of girl. I love a soft rainy day, overcast skies, cooler temps (and by cooler, I mean like 60’s- let’s not go crazy)- all of this spells the perfect day for me. HOWEVER, when you go weeks with this thick unending fog, gloomy gray taking over everything and everywhere…well let’s just say even the gloomiest of weather girl gets out of sorts. And boy, I got way out of sorts. 

I learned a lot that year, about Seasonal Depression, about what works for me and what doesn’t, and then how to prepare and work through it for future years. I will say, I am very blessed in that I deal with this in a very mild way. Most of my issues just are general mood and sleep issues. I’ve found and learned and talked through intentional ways to “trick” myself (which we’ll get into) and make this work for me. However, if you are dealing with Seasonal Depression, it’s always a good idea to talk with a therapist and figure out what works best for you. 

For me, there is a lot of intention that I put in for the winter months. I’m already a “make the mundane magical” kind of person, but this really amps up in the winter (though to be fair it’s really just amped up across the board since coming back to the States). It starts when I wake up in the morning…

One of those things I struggle with in the winter is sleep. I tend to oversleep or have very little energy to actually get up in the morning. As this goes on, I can fall into the trap of becoming a bit of a night recluse, though that tends to come later when the real overstimulation hits. A lot of my morning issues boil down to the fact that there is no light. When I wake up in the morning it’s dark, throughout the day it tends (in our area) to stay very gray, and then all of the sudden it’s dark again before dinner time. Very dark. I’ve been looking at a variety of sunrise alarm clocks, and while I still need to buy an actual one some point in the near future, this year I did get a small light that is movable that I was able to set up as a makeshift sunrise alarm clock. I picked up THIS little light and one of the settings you can program is a sunrise to go off when you’re alarm clock goes off. It’s not quite a sunrise alarm clock as those mimic the sunrise much better, typically over an hour or so, this one cycles through the brightness and colors in about a minute and a half, but it does the trick in a pinch! 

In order to combat the overwhelming urge to just snuggle under and stay in bed, I will give myself 5 minutes post alarm (10 minutes if I’m sick/slept poorly/whatever), then I sit up, turn my actual lamp on, and turn my phone upside down. Since I’m already sitting up, a full light is on, I might as well just get out of bed and get going- mind tricks at their best. My body, my mind, and my soul truly appreciate the extra quiet time in the mornings to prep myself before the kids have to get up. 

Another trick that I play on myself is to properly get ready for the day, even if I’m not going anywhere (this is absolutely not the first time I’ve shared about this phenomenon). This is a twofold situation- the first is that I always feel better when I’m at least a little put together, the second is that if you trick your body and mind into thinking something is happening, you’ll actually make things happen. For me personally, if I stay in sweats all day or pajama clothing, I tend to do very little and, as someone who NEEDS to be at least somewhat productive, this is a problem. So, I pick out an outfit that works for how I’m feeling and then I’ll figure out how to make it work for the weather (as sometimes I just cannot bring myself to wear jeans). Once I get clothes on, throw a little dash of makeup on and fiddle with my hair, I put some soft music on my phone. 

I’m a big music person- it sets the mood, can change the mood, can alter my thoughts and feelings. Most mornings it’s a soft playlist (Romanticize Your Life), a mixture of classical, movie scores, and a couple of songs that just speak to my soul. I will play it through a Bluetooth speaker once I get downstairs and the soft melodies really drift through the downstairs and create a calm, cozy atmosphere.

But, honestly, the most important thing I do for myself in the winter is work on feeling like those little moments, the first cup in the morning, watching yet another snowfall from my backdoor, spending way too much time inside my house, are actually the most magical moments. Really just marveling at what winter DOES offer, rather than what I’m losing when it’s gray for days on end and I can’t always step outside for a long walk in the woods (which I technically could still do, but most of the walking paths aren’t maintained in the winter, so it requires snowshoes and full gear). 

Even though I can’t necessarily go for the walks and fun things that I normally will do with friends when the weather is nice, I try to do other things. I’ll do a brunch charcuterie with a friend, or a reading date, things along those lines (I’m not a big gym go-er so I don’t “go workout” or walk the treadmill- though I have done that). 

I will tell you what I don’t do, or rather what I try to do less…spend time on electronics. I try to limit (as much as I can) my time on social media, my time on shopping websites (which tends to get bad in the winter), and my time watching tv/movies/YouTube. During winter I’ll fall into rabbit holes very quickly and will find myself spending hours rewatching, scrolling, whatever. Then I end up feeling worse than I did before (I know psychologically I am dissociating and all the rest of that, but I really just want to do less psycho analysis this year my goodness). I try to put my phone up at distances while I am doing other things, or just ignore it all together as much as I can. Again, not perfect (as my screen time would confirm), but it is something I tend to try to be more aware of in winter. 

You’ll notice I haven’t said anything about moving my body. It’s true that I’m a big exercise that doesn’t feel like exercise person- think hikes, walks, bike rides, and such, with a little yoga on the side. During winter outdoor walks are…difficult until they end up becoming impossible without fifty million layers. It’s also true that I’m a big believer that moving your body in some way is essential to your mental health (and your physical but you already know that). I try to move my body in some way 3 times a week. Typically, that ends up being yoga, but sometimes I try to throw a little cardio dance workout in there just to get my heartbeat going and the blood truly pumping. But I also don’t push it too much- if it happens then it’s great, if not there is another day to try. I’m always outside walking to and from the bus stop twice a day so there is something every day. 

I’ve written about romanticizing your life HERE and this is just a much bigger expansion of that. Our winter season here tends to be really bad in the January/February/a little of March time period- though I can fake it with March, pretending like Spring is coming (though it doesn’t here until late May), so I really focus on myself, my mood, and the little things during those times. It doesn’t always work, I still have rough days, but I find that it HELPS. And honestly, I’ll take any help I can get. 

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New Year, New Fashion

I feel like it seems to be every year that I make some sort of fashion post (upon review- this was much more frequent…should it come back???). Every year I have at least one, which is funny because I would not consider myself a…fashion chatter. I like what I like and I’m comfortable in what I’m comfortable in and that’s that. I don’t expect anyone to come to me for fashion advice, nor do I dole it out. I’m a big believer in the idea that if you love what you wear, you can typically wear whatever you want. It’s all about confidence.

 

With all that said, I have seemingly honed in a bit more on my style, on what I move towards and what I feel the most comfortable in. I think I’m starting to find a bit more of myself in fashion and a bit less of myself in the “trends” of the moment. So, I figured I’d talk about it because why not. It’s fun to see how we evolve over time and grow more and more into ourselves. 

If you want a quick moment to look over some of my previous fashion related posts I did one where I switched out of constantly wearing the same “momiform” of sorts (this is what kicked this off) HERE, where I shared some of  what I wore HERE and HERE (I actually have several more of these- more than I thought!), where I first talked dresses HERE, then when my style shifted a little bit more to “me” with some of my favorite dresses HERE, and then a funny one on my “winter” wardrobe HERE. Quite a few posts to see the evolution- which is fun (though I cringe at some of those-oy). 

I think my style really started to shift when we lived in Europe. It’s a whole different ballgame there on so many levels and I really was able to draw inspiration from a wide variety of options. Oddly it was as overwhelming as it was exhilarating at times. I was able to figure out what I liked/didn’t like simply by observing those around me. This is also when I started to really look at fashion accounts, find what I actually liked, and then find places that fit my budget. 

Two things I found helpful when I started trying to figure out what my style actually was, mostly so I could stop spending money on things I would either wear once or liked the idea of but didn’t realistically fit “me”. The first was a concept I stumbled on on TikTok, which is the three-word method.  Using three adjectives to describe your style, or what you want your style to convey. The first two are typically constant and describe what your current most constant style is, but the third can change from time to time, or season to season in my case, to reflect what you want in your style. I found that the three-word method really helped me with the second helpful thing- being more aware when buying clothes. I think we can all name a time where we succumbed to a purchase, or a trend and it didn’t…work out in the way we hoped for. I found that the three-word method helps narrow down not only what I liked, but what I was looking for in my own clothes/closet. 

My first two words have seemingly fit right into everything I love. I want my style to reflect effortless and classic. I don’t know if those words really fit together, but I like to think that they do. And this is my personal style so I can do whatever I like haha. I find myself avoiding most trends- they never seem to look just right on me and I don’t really want to go buy new wardrobes every single time a trend goes in or out of fashion. I’d rather have classic staples that work through trends, then if I feel drawn to something specific that is trending, I can see if it fits with what I’ve already got going on. The third word is probably the one that changes the most- I find that my needs tend to shift when one season changes into another. I tend to fall into the same line of thinking- in summer it’s “soft” or “floral”; in winter it’s “oversized” or “layered”. We’ll get into it a little bit more in a minute. 

So, when I purchase something new, I try to remind myself of a couple of things…

!) Do I have more than one thing to wear this with? You would be shocked to find out how many times any of us purchase something that only goes with…one other thing in our closet. I’ve done it countless times. So, when I purchase something, really anything, it has to be with versatility in mind. I have to be able to make at least 3-5 outfits with the new item and what I already have. 

2) Will I actually where this/Does this fit with my lifestyle? Again, you would be shocked at how many times this happens. We find that cute top or dress or heck an entire outfit, buy it and then either never find an occasion to wear it or realize that it just doesn’t fit with our day-to-day lifestyle. For me, this means that when I am buying something new it has to fit with a variety of activities. 

3)Do I already have this or something similar in my wardrobe? I’m probably the worst at this one- if I find something I like I buy it in many similar variations. While I want my wardrobe to fit my style, I want it to subtlety be different. It needs to be dynamic. If we feel like we are wearing the same thing ALL, the time- it gets stagnant. So, while I might want 5 gray sweaters, maybe I should by that pop of color sweater instead. 

4) Am I buying this because it feels “of the moment” or because I feel like it actually fits in my wardrobe? This is something I try to stick to, but probably give myself a bit more grace on this because sometimes those “of the moment” options can fit right into my existing wardrobe and become a long-standing piece. But honestly, most impulse purchases tend to be in the store going “oh this is so cute” and then I take them home, realize it’s either too trendy for me or just doesn’t look how I want it when incorporated into other outfits and it goes to the wayside. 

I’ve found that honing in on my style, then incorporating it into my buying habits, and trying to stay a bit more…strict about it has really cut down on my buying of a bunch of random clothes. I don’t stick with these hard and fast, there are times where I’ll grab something completely off the wall, but most of what I buy tends to fit very well into what I already have. 

So, what is my actual style incorporating this whole method?

Well, I found that in the warmer weather I have an affinity for dresses. I love to wear a dress the minute the weather warms enough, and I typically wear them all summer long- I’ve got enough to last (and I’m always adding more). I like to think that my summer style lends itself to that…European Countryside/Cottage Core look. I still keep the effortless and classic but add in that “soft” touch with the style of dresses- most that I lean toward tend to be longer, flowy (I love a good midi dress) and softer colors that, mostly, give hints of floral elements. Now, I do still have my jean shorts and some shorter skirts that cycle through during the summer (we do hike quite a bit when the weather turns nice) so it’s not sure fire this, but even the shorts and skirts tend to be paired with tops that fit these words. 

My Autumn/Winter style tends to be a bit more…well more. Most of the time it’s full of sweaters and pants- usually oversized sweaters with some skinny or straight leg pants. I still keep the effortless and classic, but I add in “oversized” or “layered” to my Autumn/Winter style.  Where we currently live (and honestly, it’ll probably be the same wherever we settle down to) it is simply to cold to be able to wear anything other than the chunky sweater/jeans look. And honestly, I think even if it wasn’t as cold, this would still be a bulk of my Autumn/Winter wardrobe. I do love a good sweater- I just would probably pair it with a skirt/longer dress or wear a good sweater dress. I’ve actually picked up a couple of the longer sweater/ribbed dresses for Autumn/Winter to try out. If a random warmer day pops up through the winter (or if we’re traveling to somewhere that is a bit warmer) I’ll throw those on instead.  

Two final thoughts…as you can tell from the pictures, I don’t typically go towards specific colors- though I do tend to find myself reaching for certain colors depending on my mood or just general vibe. If I had to say though (even if it’s not well represented in these photos) I tend to own a lot of blues/whites and then browns, grays, and recently some more greens. I do have a few pops of color- though they tend to be bright pops rather than softer muted tones.

Throughout the season I typically add a couple of pieces that refresh and fall into my wardrobe quite nicely and I’ve already got my eye on a couple spring/summer pieces that I’m very much looking forward to adding in.

And that’s really it! Who would have thought I would have had 1500+ words in me to share about fashion, but here we are! A little chatty clothing post to break things up a bit. 

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Best & Most Disappointing Books of 2022

Better late than never, right? Every year I compile a best and most disappointing books list for the previous year. I go through all of my stats and just give a quick…debrief as you will. And while I think the time might be close to passing to do this, life has just gotten away from me a bit. And to be honest, this is going to be a bit of a book heavy month on the blog…it’s what I’ve got going on over here right now haha. 

Also- I realize that I never wrapped up the books I read in December…I read 6 books and I honestly just don’t have it in me to go backwards and review them at this point. The standout reads were The Savior’s Book Café Story in Another World by Kyouka Izumi (manga), The Devil and the Dark Water by Stuart Turton ((Historical Mystery) and that’s really it. 

So, in 2022 I read a total of 31,032 pages across 85 books. I gave an average rating of 3.8 stars. My longest book of the year came in at 805 pages! I feel like I had several standouts for both good and…not good reasons. I will say- most of the books were average to good – even some great ones in there and this year it was actually hard to narrow down to the best books I read.  Let’s get into those…

Best Books of 2022

People Love Dead Jews by Dara Horn – Be prepared to hear a lot about this one this month (as I’m doing a nonfiction edition of Jewish Literature), but I’ll scream this to the rooftops- read this book. Seriously. This single handedly changed the way I looked at several things, and a lot of it was relating to how I look at what we consume and Jew Hatred. Read it. Read it. Read it.

Dead Silence by S.A. Barnes – Let me tell you, this science fiction novel took me by surprise. I enjoyed the suspense, the slow build up to the explosive ending, even if the ending felt a bit like an empty balloon (and I mean the end end, not the explosive ending). The atmosphere and that foreboding feeling was enough to make this a standout success for me. 

Neon Gods by Katee Robert – Boy did this book set me off on a course that I didn’t expect. Hades/Persephone retelling with a whole lot of smut thrown in…I guess I’m there. Now I will say, I do think that A Touch of Darkness by Scarlett St. Clair is BETTER, but this one gets the props because it really set me off on the road. 

My Fine Fellow by Jennieke Cohen – You’ll hear me talk about this one again next month I believe as it features in a Jewish Literature post, but I loved this young adult novel. It talks about so many different, but very real and very similar social issues that we deal with in a historical baking setting. A gender swapped retelling of Pygmalion (by Shaw) it’s a good time that had me shouting YES throughout. 

It wouldn’t be a best of list if there weren’t some Honorable Mentions…

You Truly Assumed by Laila Sabreen – I found this book, similar to My Fine Fellow, really tackled those social issues at a YA level incredibly well. As a reader you are really able to see the modern world, where internet and reality collide and how that impacts everyone, as well as different levels of hatred. 

Chain of Gold by Cassandra Clare – This was a surprise for me as I put down Cassandra Clare a long time ago and had zero interest of picking it back up. I read this on a whim and fell right back down the rabbit hole of her worlds. Looking forward to continuing on with all the series (minus the very first). 

A Touch of Darkness by Scarlett St. Clair – I mentioned this earlier, but I find this Hades/Persephone retelling to be just top notch. The entire series is a great coming of age story with a fantasy romance that just makes for fun reading. 

Foul Lady Fortune by Chloe Gong – Another smash hit by Chloe Gong! I’m looking forward to just about anything she writes. 

Disappointing Books of 2022

Only two this year as, like I said, I feel like most of my stuff was average and above, so really only two notables stand out as disappointing.

The Hunting Wives by May Cobb – This was just…not great. It was supposed to be one of those fun mystery/thrillers with like bored housewives who start something, and it gets out of hand. And it is, but it’s horrible. The main character does not have any redeeming qualities, none of the side characters are developed in a way that maybe you could root or find enjoyment in them, and the story is…predictable and nothing great. 

Trouble on the Books by Essie Lang – This one wasn’t much better than the other. I was hoping for a good cozy mystery set in/around a bookstore, small town community (a la Ellery Adams) and it was just…not. The story was flimsy, the main character who was supposed to be a “detective” in the amateur sense, was horrible and she just went off the deep end so many times. The story was a bit too convenient in too many ways and it just wasn’t enjoyable. 

So, there you have it! My Best and Most Disappointing for 2022. What tops your list for the past year??? 

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2022 – A Year in Review

Whew- 2022 is coming to a rapid end. Does anyone else just feel like…where did this year go? It can’t just be me, honest it can’t. I feel like this year has just flown by. 

The New Year is funny as I celebrate the Jewish New Year and it’s always, historically been when I feel like it’s a new year…but then I celebrate and wrap up with the English calendar. So, most of my thoughts and goals have already been stated possibly, though I have a bit of a firmer attitude at this point. 

2022 was…notable and yet not notable. I learned some things about myself, my relationships, and others that really shaped my thoughts and life moving forward. I’ve alluded to this before, but there have been some real ups and downs over the past year. Nothing terrible, but just…reminding myself of lessons I’ve learned prior to this. 

I’ve learned that jealousy from others is a very real thing and that there is nothing that you can do about it- maybe even more so when it’s about aspects that you can’t really…help. I’ve learned that as much as you might love something, if it’s toxic you have to lesson your involvement. I’ve been reminded that once you remove certain people and situations from your life you remember what life is. 

I’ve had to relearn and remind myself what sticking firm to my boundaries looks like. I’ve had to remind myself that there are shades to boundaries (remember THIS post?). I’ve had to have conversations with my children that I hadn’t expected to have yet- and I’ve said, “this is a conversation we aren’t quite ready for, but if you have any questions, please ask them”, several times. 

But I’ve had so many good times in 2022. I’ve re discovered and reminded myself who I am, the beauty and excitement and magic of the little moments I’ve found joy, happiness, and magic in the little in between moments, in the mundane daily tasks, in the tiny touches nobody notices (until they do). We’ve traveled quite a bit- NYC, Niagara, Mackinac, Toronto, Montreal, North Creek for the Autumn Leaves, and Letchworth for our Camper Trip. Our older baby “graduated” Kindergarten ahead of grade level, and our youngest started Kindergarten strong ending 2022 with an award! 

When I sat down to figure out my word of the year back during Rosh Hashanah (post HERE), I really took the time to think about what I wanted to welcome in my life in the new year. It sounds ridiculous but I really want to choose a word wisely. I don’t know it’s just important to me, but it is and this year I kind of struggled. Eventually it just came to me…

Simcha – the Hebrew word for Joy. That’s what I wanted. That was all I wanted. Joy in everything. And to be honest, I think I’ve found it. It’s funny because I picked “Simcha” because that’s what I wanted, but it’s what I had been finding for several months. I had been reminding myself what joy in everything looked like. And I feel like I’ve brought it to life, both in myself and in my family. And I’m excited to see what is coming in 2023 and my Jewish New Year has already been going SO WELL. 

What else do I want in 2023? Well, not a whole lot. I think this year is the year that I don’t have a lot of goals- every year I’ve said that I want to complete a few personal projects, and this still stands, but I don’t have a timeline for those. I started back on my podcast, and I want to continue that, I want to take on a bit more volunteer work and do more within my community. But I also want to recognize that 2023 is going to be a toucher one for us and I want to be flexible to work around the year ahead. 

I hope that everyone has a wonderful start to the New Year! Let me know if you do a word of the year, if so, what is it? Do you have any goals for the new year? 

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