6 Months In

We have lived in Interior Alaska for 6 months now. Which, honestly if we hadn’t moved with somewhat regularity, would be very hard to believe. The time has gone by so fast! 

I was asked this week if I felt like we were “settled”. It’s an interesting question. When you move as frequently as a military family can, settled carries varied levels. Do I feel like we are building our community? Yes. Do I feel like our house is set up and I’m happy with it? Yes. Are we adjusting to the new schedule and work life my husband has here? Sure…maybe…yes? So, I guess my answer overall is yes, we feel settled, but we also feel the knowledge that we could move this summer or in three years. And that’s just where we are at. We just have to enjoy what we get in each place. 

So, what were our first 6 months in Interior Alaska like? Stunning. Incredible. Cold. A little dark. But before we get into those last ones, let’s talk about Late Summer/Autumn- which were stunning. 

We arrived in Interior Alaska in the middle of July. The fireweed was still in bloom, the trees still green, and the temperatures still mild to warm (though not hot post El Paso). The sun was still shining at 11:00PM and life was good. It wasn’t the height of the summer, the height of the heat, but we got a little taste of what Summer can feel like here and we very quickly fell in love. 

Autumn lasted approximately 2 weeks, but those two weeks were so wonderful. It’s not the stunning reds/oranges/bright yellows of the Adirondacks, BUT it is this beautiful muted yellow that just sets the tone for the lead up to winter. The sunlight is starting to fade, and the trees just give this…muted but still cozy vibe. It very much adds to the feelings you get with winter approaching here. 

And Winter, ah winter…

Is it strange to say that I was actually looking forward to winter the most? Not because I was eager for the cold and dark that we had heard so much about, but I was interested in what it would actually be like. I wanted to experience it all and what did -40 really feel like? What did 3.5 hrs. of sunlight feel like? I was looking forward to that. 

I can say, with certainty, that Alaska did not disappoint. In fact, Alaska rose to the challenge and delivered us the COLDEST DECEMBER SINCE 1980. It was also the coldest month overall since January 2012. Oh, and also, we are in the SECOND LONGEST stretch of subzero temperatures since 1904. So……..ask and ye shall receive? (Though we could debate that I didn’t actually ask for this level of cold- more so just for winter here, but it’s neither here nor there…).

With all of that said, I loved winter. There’s just something incredibly special to experience extreme temperatures, learn how to adapt, and what needs to be done when it is extreme. We learned about plugging cars in or leaving them running. We learned about how to dress for the temperatures and when to get out of the house…and when it’s really just better to stay cozy. Ultimately, we learned just how well we, as humans, can adapt to mother nature. 

The daylight of it all is really not that terrible- it’s actually been nice to be honest. Most of the time we are able to still see the sun, it’s only when it’s snowy or ice fog (yes that’s a real thing and honestly probably the most miserable part of winter here) that you feel the lack of daylight. I started taking some extra Vitamin D in November and started using a sun lamp around the same time. I feel like that’s been key to my “get up and go” drive. I also use a sunlight alarm clock-which is debatable on if it works, but it certainly just sets the vibes for the day. 

The snowfall has also not been terrible. In part because it’s dry fluffy snow, but also because it doesn’t leave. It stays white and pristine and beautiful through the season (don’t worry- we will check back in at break up season and see how I feel then). It always looks and feels like a winter wonderland- especially when that sun comes out and blesses us. We’ve got a lot of snow, but it’s been spread out throughout the months, so it’s been manageable. 

Finally, the real question- the cold. It’s not…terrible. There I said it. It’s not exactly enjoyable, but if you layer up properly and have things covered, it doesn’t feel terrible until you get past around -35. Which feels wild to say. But we went and watched the Winter Solstice fireworks at -35 and we were alright for the 20-30 minutes we were outside for it. Plus, that was just a really cool experience to have. I will say, once we drop below that you will not catch me enjoying any amount of time outside…at all. But at that point as long as your properly covered then it’s fine. When running in and out stores I usually don’t even get into full gear- just a winter coat, single layer wool gloves and that’s it. 

The only really downfall is that when it gets beyond cold (so -40 and beyond) we get ice fog. And that can be rough at times. Beyond that though it’s been better than I thought it would be! 

So, all in all we LOVE it here. We are absolutely contemplating a retirement here. The community is great, the location is great, the scenery is incredible, the wildlife is amazing…we just love it. 

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A Personal Curriculum for 2026

Something I touched on and wrote about in 2025 was course curriculums. In the Autumn, I had really big plans of diving deeper into some topics that I’ve found great interest in and structuring it out and sharing it…and then life took on a whole new level of busy. I struggled to balance it all and a bunch of things fell through the cracks- the curriculum plans included. So, here we are, trying this again. But this time I am going to try and plan the whole year out…we’ll see how this goes. 

I like to think that I am a lifelong learner- I seriously just love learning about new things, or diving deeper into things that are known, but maybe looking at a different angle. This whole concept of “personal curriculum” really just gives a structure to what I already want to do and gives me a chance to have some output (because if you think I’m not going to share about this as I go along- well you would be very mistaken). 

Ultimately, I’m trying to divide this up into 3 or 4 semesters of study. While I think we could find an overarching theme to what I’m looking at, that’s not what I’m going in with. I’ve just found a couple of things that I want to dive deeper into over the past 6 months or so and I’m creating curriculums for that. 

With all that said, let’s get into my course plans. 

The first course I’ll be working on is the one that I started but didn’t finish- The Titanic “Aftermath”. I’m looking through the media coverage of the disaster, the ensuing congressional hearings, and the perception during the initial year or two following the disaster. I’ve got several books, including a collection of the testimonies from the hearings and a first-hand account of the disaster, that I’m reading. I’ve also got several documentaries and podcasts on tap to go along with my readings. I plan on checking in halfway through and then at the end- just to give an overview of what I’m learning and my thoughts around that. 

The second course I’ll be doing is a Reality Television course. More specifically- a course touching on our general obsession with Reality Television, what it is that brings us in and keeps us hooked to the shows we love and crave. I know I’m not the only one out there who loves to sit down and watch just a good reality tv episode- whether it’s Real Housewives, Members Only, or Sister Wives- I LOVE it all. And I wondered- what is it about these types of shows that just draws us in. What makes it work and last. Now, obviously outside of the books, I’ll have to watch some reality TV as well, maybe rank some shows (or seasons of shows in some cases) and discuss what works for me throughout the course. 

The third course I’ll be diving into will be a course around NASA disasters. I will be going disaster by disaster, examining what happened, what was published, how was it handled, and what changes came from it. I am most excited to read some of the transcripts from mission control and find out what went wrong and where the human factor comes in to play. I’m still early into figuring this curriculum out, so I’m still adding things as I go. NASA does fascinate me (though I don’t want to go to space nor care super strongly about space), so I’m looking forward to getting into this! 

I do have a couple ideas for a final curriculum, but I don’t want to commit just yet as I want to be gentle and not push to much onto my plate. So, we’ll stop with the three for now and I’ll share if/when it changes. Now my focuses aren’t only on the above items, I’ve got other random bits that I’m learning about (such as building an organization from the ground up, learning about different facets of our school district and funding and legislature/advocacy, along with general knowledge about our area and advocacy geared toward that), BUT this is the specific things that I want to cover outside of that. 

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On Burn Out

Hello…

Well October sure took a turn, did it for anyone else? It seems like everything almost just hit at once and then next thing I knew it was November. I seriously have no idea where the month went of what we did (well I do, it’s all on the calendar, but you know what I mean). I said yes far too many times to far too many things and I came very close to burnout only to get reprieves at the last minute (thank you to my child who needed a mental health day that coincided with my own need for a mental health day). And all while it seems like the outside world is struggling more than ever and I feel that pull that I can do more, need to do more. 

I’m well into building my community here between our Spouses Club, our Spicy Book Club, Subbing and Volunteering within the school, and our little portion of the neighborhood. That has been so good. I don’t want to say I’m hitting my stride just yet, but I’m on my way to that. 

However, I’ve definitely needed to find that balance. In fact, It’s not a balance at all- it’s a juggle. That’s what I hear in October (via a TikTok algorithm moment), and I really found that that was a slightly better mindset. Rather than finding a balance, I juggle- I focus on the balls that are currently moving and the other are in the background. It sounds weird to say and I can’t quite explain it, but this little reframing takes some of the pressure off. I can prioritize with the best of them, and this fits very well with that. I don’t have to try and focus on everything all at once, but certain things at certain times and in certain ways. 

With that though, my boundary of saying “no” has been completely obliterated. I would also say though that my boundary and ability to delegate and ask for help has improved. That’s partially because it’s been forced, but I also think I’ve just gotten more comfortable with it. Reminding myself that I don’t have to do it all myself and run myself into the ground over it has been a game changer. 

Something else that I’ve had to remind myself, is that just because I love doing all the things and that the burnout isn’t as bad or as major because I love doing all the things, doesn’t mean that I don’t experience the burnout. If that makes any sense whatsoever. In October I met with a female leader of our local Chabad (she was absolutely lovely, and I can’t wait to visit there more). While we were chatting, she said… “well what do you do to take care of yourself”. I promptly answered, “I stay up far too late reading books in the quiet of my house”. She half chuckled and that’s when it kind of dawned on me- my “taking care of myself” while re charges me, it also drains me at times. 

When my older son had a rough time and needed a mental health day- I was forced to take one to. As we sat on the couch together spending the day reading – it hit me that I needed this too. Something I had only slightly acknowledged. 

So, what does all this mean? Other than me self-analyzing and oversharing (and hopefully not coming off as complaining- as I truly love all the things, I am committing myself to) …it means that we need to continue to be mindful of our body and soul. Just because we love all the things doesn’t mean we won’t burnout. Just because we want to do all the things doesn’t mean that we can. Take some time to take care of yourself. 

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A Little Life Lately

It’s been a minute since I’ve sat down and just done a little life update- I think the last one was when we arrived in Alaska. The original post I wanted to post today is not quite ready to be shared yet, but I still wanted to stick with my schedule, so I figured a little life lately chatty post would be a fun one. 

Life has certainly picked up since the move. 

We basically got our house set up and then immediately jumped in wholeheartedly with both feet. We said yes to all the things, hit the ground running and exploring, and it’s only been recently that I feel like maybe we shouldn’t have jumped in so fast (haha). Not that I regret the choice, but more so, I’m realizing that some of the little things haven’t been sorted, the schedule and routine are all over the place, and the beginnings of burnout are settling in. In fact, as I’m writing this, I’ve taken a day to just be at home, in a quiet house, by myself. This is how I recharge. 

I’ve taken on several roles within our community, on the PTO, on our local spouses’ club, subbing in classrooms, trying to still volunteer with the USO, as well as leading 2 books clubs. And I can feel my heart being pulled in another direction as well. I’m trying to find the balance in a way that works for me, for our family, and for our community. It’s the most rewarding thing to fill my cup in these ways, but it also makes for some busy weeks and a bit of a spinning brain at times. 

My husband has also gone full force straight into work- which has been busy for him as well.  A lot of my balancing comes from trying to meet the demands on him and lessen the needs from us so he can focus fully on what he needs to get done. Part of that is just being a wife, part of it is being a military spouse. 

As for the kids- they’ve been good! They’re making their own little friend group, which includes several kiddos on our street. It’s been so great to watch them come home from school, grab their scooters and immediately head out to meet up with friends. I feel like it’s a quintessential childhood experience and I love that they’re finally getting that. (This is due to age and location that they are able to do this now) They’ve loved learning about the local area and all the unique…ness that comes with living in Interior Alaska…

Which is the perfect Segway into our first look at Interior Alaska and life here. First, and most importantly, we absolutely love it here. The beauty of Alaska is unparalleled. From just the wilderness down the road (for some outside their door), to the wildlife really ruling the land, the way you can anticipate so much just by looking out your window/at the land itself, to the freaking Northern Lights that show just about every night (though whether you see them or not due to clouds is a different story). I can safely say that we are having very serious discussions about this being a forever spot. It’s truly incredible. 

We are starting to see a change in the season- and when that started it went fast. Our Autumn colors were really only about a week to two weeks, and they were more…muted autumn tones (which I might almost prefer- it was so pretty). Autumn came and went, and we’ve settled into our 30/40-degree temps lately. We are seeing a difference in our daylight hours too. I notice it more so when I’m taking the kids to school and the sun hasn’t risen. I’m excited to see the continued changes as we start to enter proper winter. 

Finally, I don’t get political on this blog a lot (which please note some minor changes in that as I start navigating some new roles and desires and needs), but I can’t post this without speaking gently toward the Government Shutdown. We, as a military family, are looking at missing a paycheck this month. And more potentially as this continues on. There is no urgency or desire to pass even a Pay Our Troops act, let alone an actual budget. While missing a paycheck is absolutely unacceptable and puts so much hardship on families- many of whom are living paycheck to paycheck, this shutdown has even more far-reaching impacts. We were already seeing program and funding issues prior to this; those have all gotten increasingly worse. We are seeing resources being tapped out, seeing breakdown in the processes to apply for loans to cover paychecks (which we won’t even get into that process). We are seeing issues coming into programs that are deemed essential but have contracts outside the organization that do not have funding. 

All this hardship both for our troops- troops who continue to show up, to do work, to train, to do the job and they are facing losing a paycheck (at minimum), financial hardship issues both at work and at home and no sense of urgency or even a willingness to come to the table. 

***And to be fair- a lot of the issues go beyond this shutdown. There needs to be some real changes made across the board, but this is always when it comes to a head, and we really see all the shortcomings***

Please, no matter what side of the line you fall (or if you’re not on either side), we can all recognize that it shouldn’t be this way. Write your elected officials, check in with your government employee and military families and friends. 

So, that’s a little life lately…

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Fall Semester Course Curriculum

There’s a trend going around (or gone around- I’m a little late as I waited to get all of my things set before sharing) about creating our own course curriculums for learning. It is basically a bunch of women giving themselves permission to learn further about the things that intrigue them for nothing more than enjoyment of learning. This was really pushed out be a creator called Elizabeth Jean (@xparmesanprincessx on TikTok) and I’ve not only enjoyed her videos but watching everyone else also come up with their own curriculums. I’ve found some new things to look into for the future!

For me, what I want the course curriculum to be is something that I am interested in, potentially know at a basic level, but want to dig deeper into. I’m trying to steer away from topics that I might have immersed myself in prior (Henry VIII and co I’m looking at you), but I’m also not going to close myself off to them if the desire to go down a path strikes. I’m trying to keep them at the “semester” schedule- so studying across 3 months or so, just to keep myself realistic and have it be enjoyable. 

For my first curriculum I’m going to be engaging on topics that has kind of been at the forefront the past few years, is a big part of history and hoping to tie the two courses together in the coming time. I’ve given myself a syllabus and any writing or research or knowledge I gain over this period I’ll share on here 

So, first I’ll be studying the Titanic- but not the initial disaster, I think we are all very aware of what happened. I’m going to focus on the aftermath, the testimonies, the judgement, the way the news then handled this great disaster. I might try and tie in some other facets (like looking at our modern obsession with the disaster and where that stems from), but I’m not sure about that yet. I’ve picked up some books and done some initial research for this course- which I am titling Witnesses & Headlines: Testimony and Media Coverage of the Titanic Disaster. 

For my reading for this course, I’ve picked up: The Truth About the Titanic by Archibald Gracie IV, Titanic 1912: The Original News Reporting of the Sinking of the Titanic, The Titanic Disaster Hearings by Tom Kuntz, and Titanic on Trial: The Night the Titanic Sank Told Through the Testimonies of her Passengers and Crew. I plan on re watching a couple of more recent documentaries about the Titanic to go along with the course as well.

The second course I’ve picked for myself is a bit of a Gilded Age overview, titled- Class, Power, and Persona: Social Hierarchies of the Gilded Age. I’m going to be looking at social roles, gender dynamics, and class division during the Gilded Age. I think we’re all on the same page when it comes to the Gilded Age (in that we know about it, and we all watch the HBO show, but what was the day to day like? What were the true dynamics? What would it have been like to live in between Mrs. Astor and Mrs. Vanderbilt?). I’m enthralled with learning about the social dynamics and the day to day of era’s long past, much like I imagine someday in the future people might want to know our day by day (ooooofffffff). 

For my reading for this course, I’ve picked up: When the Astor’s Owned New York by Justin Kaplan, A Season of Splendor: The Court of Mrs. Astor in Gilded Age New York by Greg King, The Social Graces by Renee Rosen, and Consuelo and Alva Vanderbilt by Amanda Mackenzie Stuart. I am working on trying to find some documentaries or podcasts to go along with these books- if you know any, please let me know!

I do plan on doing all my normal reading during this time period as well and I have added some…topic specific fiction books to read during the time just to enhance the experience. I’m hoping to tie both of these together in a future curriculum covering our obsession with these eras and disasters as well as how they compare to the society of today. Alternately I could tie both these subjects together with the Belle Epoque of Paris and look at the time period as a whole leading up to the disaster of the Titanic.  But who knows, at the end I could completely move on from the subject matter!

I’m really looking forward to spending a bit more time learning this Autumn and just digging deeper into some topics that I want to learn more about. If you could study anything, create your own curriculum, what would it be? I might grab some ideas for future curriculums. 

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A Little Life Lately

Boy oh boy May has really struck. I know by now we all know the comparison of May to December, but I would hazard that May is almost busier/worse than December. Not only are the events FULL with the end of the year, sports, and such, BUT we also contend with the fact that we are looking right at summer often with our eyes half closed because we are so tired from all the things happening in May. It’s already warming up (well maybe- depending on where you are, it sure is here) and often times we are looking at some sort of something over the summer. For us, it’s a move, others it may just be kids at home all day every day. 

Somehow, I thought that by not doing sports for this one year, May would be kinder to us. I was wrong. Sure, we didn’t have to shuffle to sports after school, but my days have been cram packed full of things- from doctor appointments to physical therapy, to USO, to school bookfair and other school meetings. It seems like it hasn’t come to an end, until here we are at the end of May and my “I won’t be able to write for the first two weeks of May have turned into a whole month. Where did it go? (Yes, I am having a mini crisis over the fact that the month has seemingly ended by the time you are reading this and the day that I am writing this is one month away from our leave this state date.)

So, I thought what we could do today is have a little catch-up moment. A lot has happened this month (and last) that I’ve been semi sharing, but not really. 

First up, I injured my back mid-April. It’s been something that’s been coming for a long time (apparently my x-rays and MRI’s share quite the story) and it finally happened. What I wasn’t entirely prepared for was the sheer length of time healing is, what healing looks like, and how much a back injury truly affects you. I was in excruciating pain (I’m talking labor and worse levels) for several weeks while we tried to figure out what/where the problem was (and during this time I had some…practitioner issues as well) and then we’re still in the stage of figuring out medication. The pain has died down from the immediacy of the nerve pain, but I’m dealing with numbness. Physical Therapy is a joy (said with sarcasm), but we’re doing the thing, and a nerve test is imminent. 

The thing with your back is that it really just…handles all the things. So, when you injure it in any capacity (and I have before, but never to this level) it takes you out. It also takes a lot longer to heal. Being sidelined is not something I am good at. And honestly, I hit some really low moments, lowest I’ve had since I was post-partum with my first. I had some really big reality checks, still continue to have them, and I’m trying to stay positive and work my way through it. 

While that was ongoing, we had all the school things- the book fair, end of year planning for the PTA, end of school year meetings AND my older son had a truly terrifying event that the school wildly mishandled. I will not be going into details on that but know that my mama bear went wild and the level of stress that was going down over one situation for both me and my child was…a lot. It’s been handled at this point, and I’ve had several phone and in person meetings to ensure steps are taken so it doesn’t happen to any other children. 

And then, because we are just full of things, as I mentioned at the start, we are moving! We are moving out of El Paso and Texas, and we are headed off to ALASKA! Couldn’t get any further if we tried haha. We are incredibly excited for this next adventure (we picked it after all) and are very ready to head up north. There’s a lot I’m already planning for being up there and a lot to look forward to. 

While I can’t say that this has been our favorite place we’ve ever been (in fact the complete opposite), I do feel like we’ve made the best of it and accomplished a lot. We traveled through Arizona, Texas, and parts of New Mexico. I took on new opportunities both within our school PTA and through the USO. Our kids learned what “hot” truly is and how to handle tough situations. I’ve made so many good friendships here with women- I truly feel like I have experienced that “sisterhood” feeling that extends beyond my own small group of friends. I’m leaving here not a different person, but with more tools, information, and experiences under my belt. 

And so, content will resume. I have so many things that I have posted about, all the nature we’ve experienced/hikes we’ve done, some of our recent travels haven’t made it to the blog yet, and of course all the books I’ve been reading (I’m AHEAD of my goal!!). More to come- more to come 

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Rainy Days with Redfin!

Check out the recent Redfin article we were featured in: 

There’s something so comforting about a rainy day indoors; the rhythmic sound of raindrops, the cozy glow of warm lighting, the perfect excuse to slow down. But once the novelty wears off, cabin fever inevitably sets in, leaving you staring out the window, wondering how to make the most of the day.

Whether you’re keeping little ones entertained in your Richmond, VA home, embracing a slow morning in your San Francisco, CA apartment, or trying something new in your rental home in Austin, TX, these rainy-day activities at home will give you the perfect escape. Keep reading and let the storm rage on.

Rainy Day Activities at Home: 10 Ways to Enjoy the Gloom | Redfin

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On Springs Arrival

I’m writing this on the first day of Spring (you’re reading it the day after). It’s a truly beautiful day out here in the desert that is southwest Texas. I’m not sure where I’m going with this post, just sharing some thoughts and musings (mostly to break up the travel posts as I have 3 more of those still to go). 

Spring and Autumn are my favorite seasons. There’s just something about those transitional seasons that touches my soul. Maybe because I always feel like we are in a state of transition (or maybe because I always feel like I am coming out of the depths of something haha) or maybe it’s just the sign of change- of new things to come, a fresh moment, the beginning and ending of things. 

This Spring we are very much in a stage of transition- in every aspect of life. We are moving over the summer (yes- again), we are revamping our home, revamping wardrobes, we are having new experience, trying to figure out what this next phase of life is going to be. 

(Wow- that sounded so dramatic, but really it isn’t all that)

We spent Spring Break in Arizona, a place that I firmly believe can be a secret oasis. After spending so much of the past 9 months in true desert, seeing life, seeing greenery, experiencing different weather- it was a balm to our souls (who would have thought after 3 years of serious snow I would get excited over snow?!). 

(Again- sounds dramatic- very much is, and very much captures our feelings)

With Spring rolling in slowly (I see you friends in upstate NY); we all get to feel like we’re coming back to life. Much like nature and animals, we all hibernate to an extent in the Winter. In fact- did you know we are supposed to get more sleep in the Winter than in Summer. Our bodies do follow the seasons (much like other cycles) and adjust accordingly. And now, with the weather shifting, the temperature warming up, the daylight getting longer, and we all feel better for it. Kind of like that trend of “I didn’t believe in seasonal depression until I went outside on a sunny day and x temperature”. 

I will be honest; it simultaneously feels and doesn’t feel like Spring here in the desert. The trees are starting to leaf up and bloom and the temperatures have gone from 50’s/60’s to high 80’s almost overnight. We get the drastic 40 degree jumps between morning and afternoon. BUT it’s still so brown- nary a flower in sight! While I feel like I am coming back to life with all the Spring things, it very much feels like my surroundings are still stuck in the same landscape that never changes. 

As someone who lives for the fields of wildflowers, the planted rose gardens, the wild fields of grass- this has been a massive adjustment over the past 9 months, and I haven’t felt it nearly as much as I have coming into this Spring season. 

(You must think I hate it here- but I don’t entirely. It’s presented its challenges while we’ve been here and the dust storms are an absolute nightmare, and I’m very ready to move, but I don’t HATE it here.)

All those words to say- I am very ready to welcome Spring. I am ready for life to “begin again” and to see what the next few months bring. 

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On this International Holocaust Remembrance Day

I said I wanted to share more of my heart on here, I wanted to share more real-world stuff, more of my “unfiltered”/” real world” thoughts, but man it’s scary! Especially on a day like today, in a world like we are in…but here goes.

Today (well the day that I am writing this- not sure if it’ll be posted same day or if I’ll sit on it for a couple days) is International Holocaust Remembrance Day. It is the day that the U.N. decided should be used to remember the Holocaust as it is the day that Auschwitz was liberated by the Allies. 80 years ago, today. In fact, the picture in the featured image (also below) is the sign at Auschwitz. The sign that has become synonymous with The Holocaust- which the saying and sign ARE, BUT this Auschwitz sign was actually at the “nicer” side of Auschwitz. Not the side that the Jewish people lived and starved and were murdered in gas chambers.

I feel like it’s important to note that this is NOT the day that the Jewish people mourn and remember- the Jewish people have a dedicated holiday called Yom HaShoah, which is in time with the Warsaw Ghetto uprising (you know- the notable important time when the Jews fought back). ***Don’t worry I’m trying to edit out some of my anger in this post***

Today I feel conflicted. It’s so important to remember (you know- we all say Never Forget like the good little citizens as the rise of Jew Hatred surges to unimaginable numbers), but this year I am filled with anger, with sadness, with heartbreak, with hope (because the Jewish people will survive), with frustration. 

We have people in power politicizing gestures (which- let’s face it, that was what it was regardless of how it was then politicized and the reaction from the person who did it was disgusting at best, horrifying and terrifying at worst- and that margin is microscopic), while Jews are being attacked physically and emotionally/mentally every day. There are BABIES BEING HELD BY A TERRORIST ORGANIZATION, but go off on a hand gesture (which again was what we all thought it was) fam. 

We say, “Never Forget” and then turn a cheek at chants, flyers, disruptions on college campuses intended to terrify, to harm, to disrupt. We say, “Never Forget” and then twist our bodies into pretzels to justify an actual TERRORIST ORGANIZATION kidnapping CIVILIANS and BODIES and holding them hostage for over a year, chanting horrible words, parading their crimes as others cheer. We say “Never Forget” as a holocaust survivor just passed away in December, having survived both Holocaust, but losing two of his GRANDCHILDREN on October 7th. 

***And let me be clear because there will be those who NEED this disclaimer because they don’t know me, they don’t know my heart, my feelings, my beliefs and they will take this post and turn it into something entirely different. I should not have to say this but here I am- you can be pro the Palestinians living in peace in their own home AND be pro Israelis living in peace in their own homes. You can recognize the actual history of the land and the people and not try to rewrite it to continue twisting your pretzel. You can be with the families of those murdered in cold blood on October 7th and the day, months following, be with the families of these hostages, these CIVILIANS, who were brutally taken, be with all of the people who are now living with very real trauma. You can do all of that and still believe that both sides deserve and need peace. It’s not one side only. Not if you have your humanity intact.***

Words have power if we give them power, right? And how do we give words power? With action. Never Forget means to never forget- it means both holding the memories of survivors, sharing their stories, facing the atrocity head on, AND stopping the rampant Jew Hatred, both overt and subtle, in its’ tracks. 

So, this year, on this International Holocaust Remembrance Day, I want to not only see all the shared posts about “Never Forget”, but I also want to see a post about present day Jew Hatred that needs to stop. I want to challenge you to go beyond the minimum, to truly embrace “Never Forget”. Because we are forgetting. 

Almost 2/3rds of American Millennials (millennials- my generation) and Gen Z do not know that 6 million Jews were killed in the Holocaust. 48% could not name a single concentration camp. 23% believe that the Holocaust is just a myth, didn’t happen or was exaggerated. These are HISTORY facts that folks don’t know about or don’t believe happen. Millennials and Gen Z are those who are leading the way (in a grassroots sense) for the next stage of our future. We have people on video calls saying we no longer need to carry guilt for the Holocaust. We need to move on. If we “move on”, if we do not learn from history, we are doomed to repeat it. And let me say this- we are repeating it. We are repeating it. 

So, I ask that you not simply say the words “Never Forget”, but that you give those words power again. That you speak about what you see. That you stand up. 

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Where do I even begin?

I don’t want to come on here and go- oh look I’m back (again)! Because I feel like that’s fake…that’s wrong…I’ve done that so many times before. The truth is, when life picks up this tends to be the first thing that falls off. It’s not intentional, just a fact of life at this point unfortunately. 

And then I always find myself wanting to find a balance- I want to share all the things, but I don’t want to talk about things or have them go the wrong way. Which is funny because in “the real world” I tend to have some pretty vocal opinions and thoughts. But the internet is such a fickle place- you can’t read intention, you can’t read facial expressions, you can’t read my tone, you just read my words and interpret them through your own lens of life. 

And then the new year came. And with this new year we will be moving, and life will be in a bit of an upheaval for a time. And I also haven’t been feeling very “new year hoorah” this new year. Maybe it’s because much of 2024 and 2025 are transient (and I don’t mean that in the strictest sense, more so in the sense that a lot of it is up in the air and we’re just rolling with life). 

And then I read all of that back and I just think…why? What’s the point of that? It all sounds so melodramatic and unnecessary. The life of an overthinker, over analyzer. 

Oh, and I’m doing all of this while trying to backup all my tens of thousands of photos on my computer so I can add more thousands of photos so I can clear up space and catch up on life on here… The little photo app keeps popping up errors of duplicates and I keep pressing ok and trying to type while the boys run amok on the last two days of Holiday Break…I mean if this doesn’t describe my life at the present- well the massive run on sentence of this paragraph sure will. 

So, what am I actually saying? What is actually going through my head? That’s a good question. 

I want to come back- slowly, tentatively, intentionally. I want to start sharing more of my “real world” thoughts and opinions. I want to share more of what I am doing (as it’s been a lot). I want to share more of what I’m seeing, what my thoughts are on that, where I fall in the status quo. 

Ultimately, I want to start laying the online groundwork of what I’ve been doing in the “real world”. I don’t really know why, but I feel like I can do MORE a lot of times and I want to do MORE and so I’m going to try. I want to share fluff, talk nonsense, talk pop culture, but I also want to talk about real issues, about ****hides**** political issues ****she said it****, about issues military families can face, about issues that occur in other countries. I want to talk books, I want to talk travel, I want to talk LIFE. 

I want to talk about my favorite reads of the month or year, about putting together a galantines basket, hosting a book club, hosting an event, and also about what I experience volunteering with the USO, what I see for struggles in our community, about how oppression occurs throughout the world (and isn’t limited to the groups we loudly talk about), about how hypocritical politics has become. All the facets of LIFE. 

So, here I am going to go- dipping my toe in. Please bear with me as I figure out blogging and posting again. And- as always, if you want to see day to day or real time or other fun things, you can follow me on IG, TikTok (for now), Facebook, Goodreads (I’m on some other book apps if you’d like to follow me there I can share those too), and I’m sure I’ll join whatever will replace TikTok if the inevitable does in fact happen. 

Oh look- my photos from 2016 have exported to my portable hard drive (yes that’s how long it’s been). Off I go back to the photo world. 

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