Mid Week Meltdowns

Almost every week, like clockwork,  we have one day that is just all around rough.  A day where it just seems like both boys spend the day in tears, fighting, or just overall in a yuck mood. It has become such a part of our life, that I have coined the term “Mid Week Meltdown” to put a name on that day. Mid Week came from the fact that it is typically on a Wednesday. The exact middle of the week and both boys just go off to another world. Mid Week Meltdown days typically look something like this:

Now, we don’t experience this every single week, but it does occur quite frequently. While I don’t have a perfect way of dealing with these days, I have honed down just a couple of tips to keep myself sane, and then in turn help me help the boys out. This definitely isn’t perfect or even the best answer, but I have found that on days where nothing seems to be working, these are the things that I try to keep in mind on these days.

The first thing I try to remember is that it is just a phase/day/season. It will not stay forever. These rough days (or even full patches) are just that. They will come to an end, and both myself and our children will come through them with new tools. No matter how long the time may seem, it will resolve (or it’ll be bedtime haha).

The second thing I try to keep in mind is that my oldest is only two years old. He doesn’t possess the full vocabulary and knowledge to express everything that he is feeling/going through. Hell sometimes he can’t even truly express what he actually wants. Their brains are developing and while we can (and do) teach him, there are times when he just isn’t able to communicate what exactly it is that he needs in that moment.

What I have found in dealing with this is that alone time can be crucial. Hear me out with this one as it is an important lesson to learn, even with newborns. When the point comes (and it will come) that quite honestly NOTHING seems to be working. No tool in your toolbox is helping yourself or your kid and both of you are reaching the end of your rope, separation is key. Honestly I find that putting our oldest in his room- separating him from not only whatever it is that is causing the frustration and from me (who at this point is dwindling and holding on by a single piece of hair) solves a lot of the issue. We both have a chance to cool down, me in the quiet, him in the sanctuary of his own space, and just a few minutes later we re unite and are actually able to talk (and hug) and all is right again.

I don’t treat this as a time out. He has had time outs before and with those his toys are picked up off the floor in his room and he has a set period of time. This is more of a comfort time. Where he just needs the sanctuary of his own space where he can just take a moment to collect himself. We all need this time, even as adults.

Now, heading to rooms and walking away is not the first choice. It is not something I do right off the bat. I usually try and work with our oldest and see if we can work together to figure out whatever is causing the problem. However there are times where the only thing that will really work is him going into his room and take a little break. When these times come, I am more than happy to let him go into his room, his sanctuary, and take a moment to himself. 90% of the time he takes a couple of minutes, calms down, and it’s as if nothing ever happened. We have some squeezes, a kiss and off we go to play.

Have you experienced a meltdown? What are your tips?

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Snow for Days…A Recap

It wasn’t really for “days” per se, more like a day and a half, but still…

Mother Nature seemed to hear my plea of spring weather and decided she would answer it with a blast of cold weather and a semi decent amount of snow )at least for this area).

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About the middle of the week we got to live in a snow globe as we watched the big snowflakes fall down in a just-so picture perfect way. I do have to say, when I see the view out of my back window after this snowfall, it does take my breath away. It reminds me of the moments that I do enjoy winter and I got to curl up in my chair with my tea for a couple of minutes and just watch the snow fall down.

The boys also got to enjoy the snow as we ventured outside in the late afternoon. It was Andrew’s first time around snow and he was definitely less than thrilled. I’m still trying to figure out if that was because of the snow, the cold, the ill fitting snowsuit (seriously this should have been too big on him…it wasn’t) or a combination of all the above. He just watched as his big brother ran along throwing snow and sledding.

Colton has a real love for the snow. Once you get him outside, he just runs crazy! I mean, he does that regardless of snow, but he takes the excitement to a new level when there is snow on the ground. He picked up and threw snowballs, got to go sledding for the first time, and ruthlessly teased the dog with little “snow treats” (basically just more snowballs).

The snow only lasted about a day and a half total, but it was really nice while it was there. It was a nice send off to winter and it was nice to feel like I was in a real life Hallmark movie for a minute or two. Now though, let’s get on to the warmer temperatures, the sunshine, and overall brightness that is spring!

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How to Become A Morning Person

I have to say- I love the sunrise. It is quite possibly my favorite part of the day, but getting up for it? Let’s face it- not everyone is a morning person. For most, mornings are something to trade through until that first cp of tea or coffee sets in.

HOWEVER mornings can be your best friend (or at least a close acquaintance). I have found that getting up a little bit earlier, before the kids and the responsibilities not only makes the day go better, but just just makes everything a little more enjoyable and more gets accomplished. I am a happier, more productive individual when I have those extra few minutes to get myself and my head together rather than trying to do that WHILE trying to take care of the kids and responsibilities. I have, over the past year or so, become…a morning person.

Obviously, these may be different for different people, but I wanted to share a couple tips on what helped me become a morning person.

  1. Go to bed earlier. I know- obvious and not always practical. This point goes along with the next one, but you will be surprised how you (and your body!) will adjust to this.
  2. Wake up earlier in 15 minute increments. DO NOT just start off by waking up at your goal time right off the back. This will fail miserably and you will be right back where you started. If you know what time you need/would like to wake up every morning, then set your alarm clock 15 minutes earlier every week until you hit that goal time. This gives your body a good amount of time to make adjustments naturally.
  3. DONT press the snooze button. Also, don’t set multiple alarms. This gives you an “out” to waking up earlier. I know how tempting that snooze button is and how easy it is to say oh only 10 more minutes and then I’ll get up. Let’s be honest, you won’t. Just RESIST that temptation and get up right at the beginning of your alarm.
  4. Do not stay in bed! Shut the alarm off and get up right away. Staying in bed will not allow your body to start waking up and get blood flowing. Whether this means putting your phone/clock all the way across the room, forcing you to get up and shut it off, or having a super obnoxious tone set for the alarm, do it. Set it up so that you force yourself out of bed. That will make it easier to get to the last (and best) tip.
  5. Have one morning thing. What is one thing that you look forward to being able to do every morning/day. Maybe it is making that first cup of coffee/tea. Maybe it is working out. Maybe it is simply taking a shower or getting ready for the day. Whatever it is, do it first thing in the morning. Right when you wake up and roll out of bed (already a little more rested because you want to bed a little earlier), do that one thing. When you have something to look forward to right at the outset, it makes the whole process of getting up earlier easier.

Those are my tips! Start at the top, work your way down and in no time you’ll be watching the sunrise with me…or not, but you’ll be more of a morning person than when you started out!

What have you found that works for you in the mornings?

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Spring is Right Around the Corner…

4315430272_IMG_0546Seriously. Our first blooms have popped through on the bushes and even though the weather may not be full “spring” beauty and warmth, the first official day of spring is tomorrow! First off, where is this year going? I feel like already the time is just flying by. Second off, spring seems to be a season similar to the new year. An almost “out with the old, in with the new” type of vibe to it.

We start to shed all of the layers of winter, not just in our clothes, but in our homes, our meals, our everyday life. Spring seems to bring a new lightness to everyday. It appears slowly, with a massive Spring Cleaning to start off with. A purge of the old, of what no longer works in the home, of what is no longer needed. Then comes the cleaning of spaces. A whole house and self scrub down you could say. Then, finally, it is in with the new.

Spring is a season of change. If you would have asked me just a few short years ago if I liked it, I would have shrugged my shoulders; “I’m more of a fall type of gal”. While I am still a “fall type of gal”, I have started to see the love of Spring. When the worst of winter starts to fade away, and a glimpse of summer peaks through. I thoroughly enjoy the idea of clearing away and cleaning out our wardrobes, home, and meal ideas. I also LOVE the fact that spring brings the “cool warm” temperatures that allow me to open our windows all day long.

Following along with the start of Spring, you will start to see the scheduled Wednesday blog posts following along with the concept of purge, clean, refresh for the month of April. It is really easy to do the spring overhaul in April as the weather is still finding its way and it really is just a transition month to the full warmth of spring in May. It’s a good time to look at how your year has started off, what you want to change and keep from the first few months, and what you want to do moving forward. I will be doing this myself in our own home, so I’m looking forward to sharing it with you!

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Real Talk: Winter Blues

Let’s face it- February and March are two of the hardest months of the year. All of the momentum and excitement from the New Year is starting to wear off and winter is usually the worst in these two months. The slump because real when the skies seem to be a never-ending shade of grey, the temperatures are frigid (although we have had a couple good days) and those super cute summery clothes are mocking you from the deep recesses of your closet.

While I personally am a fan of grey, rainy, dreary weather, I too can become a victim of the Winter Blues. When everything becomes stagnant, and there seems to be a general slump of feelings and just sadness. As cheesy as it sounds, the sun plays a vital role in your feelings and well being. It’s always cheery when it’s sunny. Right now though it’s a rough time of year and it is super easy to just let those feelings take over your life and seep into everything you do.

I recently posted about my top 5 tricks to getting out of a bad mood/day, which you can find HERE. This Real Talk is kind of an extension of that, because this is such a time of year for these types of feelings. The Winter Blues are kind of a tough cookie to deal with because it’s not always so simple to break out of those slumps. Sometimes it’s all you can do to just hold on and ride the slump out till better days hit. If you can though, it’s always better to try and pick yourself up and keep moving forward.

So, how do you do that?

Find one positive thing in everyday. This may sound like an over simplification, and in some ways it is, but realistically if you try and focus on the good the bad doesn’t have a chance to take over. The positive thing may only be that you got out of bed and put on real clothes instead of just sweats or it may be that you crossed every item on your to do list off. It doesn’t matter how big or little you think the positive thing is, find it.

By making a choice at the end of everyday to find one positive thing you will not only find that there are more than a few positive things, but you will find yourself a little more energized to do more the next day. By continuing to focus on the little “wins” of everyday, you will slowly turn your mindset around and before you know it, you’ll be out of that Winter Blues slump.

So what do you do when the Winter Blues hit? Do you find that you are able to quickly bounce through those blues and back to a happy mood or does it take you a little while to get back into your happy place?

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A Weekend of Nothing…A Little Recap

I don’t want to feel like a broken record, so I WON’T talk about how busy this past week was or how I really needed to get away from all the busy and soak up a little bit of life. Instead what I WILL tell you about is our weekend of glorious nothing.

It’s been so long since we just had a weekend of nothing. The only time we left the house was to go get groceries. I think I only got out of my pajamas once (to go get groceries), I didn’t put make up, we ordered in for one of the nights and just overall relaxed.

Of course my husband ended up having to spend a good amount of his Saturday writing a paper for his class, but he did that during nap times and didn’t miss out on too much. I got a large amount of no pressure reading done.

We sat and watched our oldest run in never ending circles, our youngest explore the dog dishes, and quite a few movies. We even fell asleep on the couch for a little bit!

Honestly, I couldn’t think of a more perfect weekend for us. It was just so relaxing, so lovely, and I really enjoyed every minute of it…

Funny enough, Daylight Savings Time couldn’t even bring me down! Sure it made me a little more tired, but par for the course. I just added a little bit more tea to each cup to soak up a bit more caffeine and just took it easy. It didn’t even touch the kids (or their never ending energy).

Next weekend we will be back to our normal of getting out, exploring, and being out of the house more, but this past weekend…such a wonderful thing! It made getting up this Monday morning with a smile on my (and everyone in our home) face so much easier.

How was your weekend? Did you do a lot of running or not so much?

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The 5 W’s of A Cuppa Cosy

I wanted to take a quick moment today and touch base with myself, with you, and just lay out who I am (which most of you probably already know), what A Cuppa Cosy is/what I want to do, where, when, and most importantly WHY.

So…

Speier Family in Alexandria, VA

Who: If you’ve been around for al little while you know who I am. If you’re new, hi! I’m Mia, a wife, mom, homemaker, business owner, and employee. I am a lover of all things cosy, an avid reader, a serious tea drinker and a semi adventurer. There are a few things I am passionate about (aside from my family) and those things are: mental and physical health, travel and being 100% in every aspect of your life. I don’t mince words, I wont BS you, and will always be 100% authentic.

What: This is a place for me to share my life, my stories, my everyday to help you not feel so alone. A feeling of meeting up with a good friend a chatting over a cup of tea/coffee. Someone that you feel like you are right in the trenches of life with in a place where not everything is perfectly curated with all the sunshine and daisies. A place that is true to every aspect of life, the good and the bad. I want to create a community of women and moms who are just experiencing life together.

Where: Well, I’ve got this blog which will feature 2 posts a week, along with a Facebook Page (HERE) and Instagram Page (HERE) for everyday day glimpses. I will also have a Facebook Group for the community and all of us to share day to day, but that is currently in development. Like & Follow the blog and social media and check back for updates on the Facebook Group!

When: Blog Posts will be posted on Mondays and Wednesdays- Mondays being more of a recap/spontaneous style, Wednesdays being more of a tip or learning post.

Why: I see a lot of either end of the spectrum- the perfectly coiffed, always perfect, ready to go mom and family OR the over the top hot mess, don’t care mom. I have not seen a place where there is a middle ground. Where there is a place that is both good and bad and in a way that is completely real and authentic. I didn’t see a view of just a real woman who is going through real life- with all of it’s ups and downs.

I want to help women and moms by sharing my story/life and giving them a real community to share, learn, and uplift so they can be their best selves in their own lives (all while being as cosy as possible 🙂 ).

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A Lesson Well Learned…A Little Recap

I feel like I’ve had those back to back weeks where you just don’t catch a break. The first week was just a rough week. Everything that could go wrong went wrong and we all just tried to hold on to the ride. This past week, I felt like I was a hamster on a wheel; never stopping and never getting anywhere. I had SO MUCH that I was trying to accomplish. So many thoughts and ideas constantly going through my head, that it felt like if I didn’t get them out right then and there, they would disappear into the great unknown of my brain.

Basically, rough week followed by insane week. I’ll let you be the judge as to which type of week is worse.

It was around Wednesday or so that I realized I didn’t even know how I was spending my time. I was so far on the wheel, that I couldn’t truly account for where my time I had gone. Sure, I know what hours and work I had accomplished for my part time work, but beyond that- no idea. I was head deep in everything else that I needed to do, needed to get done, and needed to get out of my head that I hadn’t even taken two seconds to look outside. IMG_0491

It was a beautiful day on Wednesday. A perfect day some would say (seeing how the weather turned bad quickly, others may say it was a “calm before the storm”). The sun was bright, not many clouds in sight and whats more, it was the perfect temperature. I sat at our dining room table just stunned for a moment as the realization of what was going on hit me.

I needed to get off that wheel and get off it fast. I decided that lunchtime on that beautiful day would be spent outside, getting some rays (and Vitamin D!) and just overall reveling in what was a perfect little break. Not only did I come back in feeling much more refreshed and ready to get back into the thick of things, but I got some much needed free time with my children. Such freedom is found when you can just galavant across the backyard.

To top off my insane week even further, at some point in the past week my youngest started developing more of that “big boy” look to him. He is still young and is still a baby, but he just started looking and doing things that just made my mommy heart cry out- my little baby is starting to grow up. I didn’t even know when that had started, just a week ago he was still wanting to snuggle and sleep on my chest (ok, ok, he still does some of that) and now here he is, standing against furniture, babbling, scooting all over the place, and just overall acting and starting to look like a little boy rather than a baby.

It took these two “shocks” to my system to remind myself of a couple things.

One, I am never going to get these times back. My children are not always going to want to just run around with mommy in the backyard. They aren’t always going to find that little joy in the birds flying overhead or the trees swaying in an absolutely ridiculous windstorm.

Two, anything that falls with number one goes ahead of ANYTHING else. My little family is above anything else. It is so easy to get caught up in everything else that is going on and trying to get things done and it can be so hard to see that you are losing sight of what is truly important until you have a moment like I did on Wednesday.

We’ve had a relatively easy weekend, getting back from the insanity of the week and re grounding ourselves into our little family and just focusing on each other.

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Five Tips to Get Out of a Bad Mood/Day

Let’s face it, we all have those bad or “in a funk” days. The days that kind of end up like this:

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fun fact- this is a real shot from a real life in a funk day

This is life and even if you are living a fulfilled life, you still have these kinds of days. The days where it just starts off on the wrong foot and seems to go downhill fast OR maybe it starts off well, but just descends into chaos. Recently for me it just seemed to be a mess in all facets (see weekly recap post HERE). I am not a person who likes to live or dwell in those bad day or funks – really who does?- so I’ve created a list of tips for erasing those bad feelings and getting back into a good head space.

  1. Stop what you are doing. Whether or not what you are doing is the cause of your frustration or bad mood, continuing to do whatever you are doing will be a wasted effort. Once you are in a bad mood your productivity decreases, your enjoyment/fulfillment decreases, and you may end up creating more anger/frustration and ultimately more work for yourself by continuing. Take a break from what you are doing and physically leave the space that you are in. This is a very important step to getting out of this bad head space that you are in. Possibly the most important step.
  2. Get outside. This step kind of co insides with the next one, but I find that a lot of times that just getting out of the house (or office), breathing in some fresh air and soaking up a little sun will start to turn things around. We are not meant to be indoor creatures and just getting a little daylight, getting some fresh air, and being away from whatever physical space you were in may be the remedy for you.
  3. Do some sort of physical activity. The top of this list would be to go and take a walk outside. Not only does just simply getting outside into daylight and fresh air immensely help a bad mood or funk, but the physical exercise of a walk will stimulate your body and senses. When you come back you will feel refreshed and start to feel a bit better and more collected. If you cannot get outside, simply walking around your home or doing a couple of quick full body stretches/quick yoga routine in a sun/day lit part of your home will do the same trick.
  4. Make yourself a cup of tea or coffee. The simple act of making yourself a cuppa combined with taking a few minutes to yourself to enjoy it will do wonders for yourself. Not only will this simple act turn things around, but the cup of tea or coffee will do a lot more for your mood than you would think. Drinking a cup of tea or coffee almost forces you to stop for a minute. It makes you take that step back, breathe and really just savor the flavor of your drink. Some people would equate this to drinking a glass of wine, I would shy away from that. Depending on what you are doing prior to this bad mood or your responsibilities, this a) may not be a possibility, but b) it doesn’t always provide the same mood booster as a cup of tea. Ultimately though you know what will work best for you.
  5. Do one thing for yourself. This is beyond what you’ve done in the previous steps. Sometimes we just need that one extra thing to set us up for a true good mood. This could be watching a couple videos, taking a little bit of time to goof around, having an impromptu dance party, reading a bit of a book, whatever it is that you can do to have a little treat for yourself. Make this be a separate action from the previous steps so you can fully just enjoy a little bit of time.

By doing those 5 little tricks when I am having a rough day, I find that my mood lifts and while I still may need to go back and deal with whatever frustrated me or whatever was wrong in the first place, I can do so in a better, clearer head space than before.

I hope these tips help you out and I would love to hear what your tips are as well! Leave me a comment down below!

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Coming Back from “Hot Mess-Ville”

It was a rough week. To be brutally honest, I had one of those weeks where by the end of it, you are just grateful to have gotten yourself, your husband, and your children through the week unscathed. I don’t even know if I could tell you what happened to set the week off, or how we got to such a rough spot, all I know was that somewhere along the way I had boarded the express train to Hot Mess-ville.

Normally I can still keep my head up if it is just one person in our family having a rough week. I can up the care that that person receives and adjust everything else as needed. But when everyone is just in that rough spot, it makes it ten times harder.

Let’s see…

Our oldest was just having an “off” week. There isn’t anything going on with him aside from an exacerbation of the normal 2 year old problems. It seemed like everything was magnified and even the littlest things became a major temper tantrum. We did a lot of bedroom cool downs, mom/dad snuggles, and just lay and cries with him. The combination of him being such a stubborn independent child, with a very full, strong willed personality makes for some good and some bad situations. We are still trying to learn what works best for him and how to teach him.

Our youngest was having a nice amount of his own issues as well. He’s getting those two top teeth and he is an angry teether (our oldest was quite mild with teething until his canines and molars). We had a lot of fussing, A LOT of snuggling, but not a lot of day time napping. I know I shouldn’t complain because he is an excellent night time sleeper, but daytime naps play such an integral role for both of the children and when they are cut back in time or don’t happen it makes for a tough rest of the day.

On top of that, both boys are going through growth spurts. It seemed like I was trying to feed double our household. I know this is going to be a situation we frequently encounter as they are boys and will continue to consume more food than I thought possible (our oldest had 2.5 pancakes for breakfast one morning?!) for the rest of their lives. At times it seemed that we would never get a reprieve from the crying.

With all of that going on, I was dealing with a come and go migraine all week long and was overall just feeling all out of sorts. I felt like I wasn’t accomplishing anything when it came to day to day tasks (although I was) and there were a couple moments over the week that I just ended up “throwing in the towel”. My husband was trying to sort out what his new assignment and responsibilities would be.

Somehow though, we’ve all made it through the week and it’s time to put this bad one behind us as we step into a new week. Things seem to already be looking up as I am writing this as we’ve got the grocery shopping done for the week (cheaper than last week!) and I have a bit of free time to just relax before getting dinner ready. I fully plan on enjoying my cup of tea and getting a little reading done while the kids (actually) nap! Ah such bliss after a rough week.

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